By Bella Gill; Psychic, Medium and Healer www.belgill.com
Connecting With Loved Ones: Christmas can be a tough time for those who have lost loved ones. How can we stay connected to those we’ve lost?
For the first few years after my Dad passed away I hated Christmas. It felt like an unavoidable reminder of the fact that my family was no longer complete, and the only thing I could focus on was the fact that he wasn’t there. It was lonely, and I did everything I could to pretend it was just an ordinary day, but it wasnt, and I was aware of his absence in everything I did. I spoke to people who had lost parents, and I came to see that it was an epidemic for many, the Christmas blues. for some it is one of the loneliest days of the year, when in fact, it should be an opportunity to share and celebrate with the people you love.
So what do you do? How can you fill the space of those who are missing from the Christmas table? I think its different for everyone, but the most important thing is to remind yourself that they though they are not there in the physical sense, they are there in spirit. I began a new ritual after the first few years, where instead of focusing on the fact that my Dad was missing, I reminded myself of all the amazing Christmas’s and years we had shared together while he was here, and of how much fun we had. Its easy to turn our attention to what is missing in our lives, but the fastest way to feeling better about things is to see the positive aspects in it. Especially in situations where you have no control over it. Try as I might, I could’nt have Dad at the table for turkey and a tooheys new, BUT, I did have the power to change the way I felt about it. Sometimes that can make all the difference.
It doesnt magically make it all feel ok, the fact is they are gone, and we miss them, thats real, and sad. But it doesnt have to end there. CELEBRATE, because they lived, they changed your life with their presence, your who you are because of what you shared together, and though they may now be on a different journey, they are always with you.
If you want to feel more connected to them, speak to them, trust yourself, trust what you feel, its how they are communicating with you, through your feelings. This can take a bit of practice, but everyone can do it! And lastly, enjoy your day for what it is, there are things we cannot change, but there is also alot we can. You have the power to choose how you will celebrate their memory, know they are there with you, not just for this day, but all of them. And have at least, a little bit of fun!.
Happy Christmas everyone.
Love and blessings to you all for 2012.