By Kathryn Eisman, Love Expert
www.kathryneisman.com/
Are you afraid your wedding gown will outlast the groom? RESCU’s love expert, Kathryn Eisman, discovers the secrets to happily EVER after.
Recently I attended my sister’s wedding. It had all the necessary elements required to make a wedding beautiful; a cascading silk satin mermaid gown, an adorable five-year-old ring bearer, an aisle sprinkled with pastel rose petals, and music good enough to make you get off your chair despite your aching stiletto clad feet. But there was one element that stood out, which outshone the crystal chandeliers and delighted guests more than the sweet smell of the jasmine centrepieces. Love. Every person in attendance could not help but feel the deep, profound love the Bride and Groom shared. The illation of feeling they had finally met and married their soul mate.
It was evident as they recited their vows, only briefly unlocking eyes to look at the hand scribbled sentences in their trembling fingers. It was palpable as they shared their first dance, their arms wrapped around each other as if holding a priceless gift. It was obvious as they declared their affections before a room filled with the people who knew them best. Love was alive and well at this wedding, and we were all touched by its warm embrace.
But like all things of beauty, their love was a source of reflection; making every person in the room analyse the status of their own relationship. While for some, it acted as a passive renewal of their own wedding vows, for others, it was a confronting reminder of their own relationship shortcomings. Like a fake handbag that looks passable alone, once put beside the genuine article, its leather looked scratchy, its hardware flimsy, its label not quite right.
In life, I believe there are four types of romantic relationships:
1) The One
2) The one who turns out to be not to be the One
3) The One who was never supposed to be anyone
4) The One that feels like sloppy seconds
Many of us can try to fool ourselves with romantic hope into believing we are with ‘The One’, and we can get away with it most of the time. But there are some occasions, such as my sister’s wedding, where we simply cannot fool ourselves a moment longer, when the disquiet becomes so loud that we’re forced to admit, if only for a moment, that our ‘great love’ is at best ‘good’.
So next time you attend a wedding, how do you prevent your love feeling like a cheap knock-off?
1. Listen to that little voice deep down and be honest about your real reasons for staying in the relationship. Better to have the courage to leave a ‘good’ relationship, than the strength to stay in a bad marriage.
2. If you’re already hitched, remind yourself what made you fall in love with your partner to begin with. And even more importantly, remind yourself what made them fall in love with you. Be those things.
Because unlike the ivory wedding gown, a marriage is something you have to live in every single day. So it makes sense you pick wisely and take care of it, so that it fits and flatters you for as long as you both shall live.
Some scary stats:
According to a study of 4000 married couples, 15% of engaged couples planning to get married have misgivings about their upcoming nuptials. While a shocking 23 percent said they would not marry their partner if they could do it all over again, and 14 percent wished they had married someone else from their past.
For more info on Kathryn, go to her official website: www.kathryneisman.com/ Or click here to follow her on Twitter.
Rescu. is proud to announce that author Kathryn Eisman was announced the winner in Cosmopolitan Magazine’s “Fun, Fearless Female Awards” in her category. To view the other winners, go towww.cosmopolitan.com.au/funfearlessfemale.htm. And if you voted for Kathryn – thank you for your support.