Don’t want boring lingerie, cliched body chocolate or silly bedroom games this Valentine’s? Here’s your chance to really rock the boat and give yourself and your partner a year of unforgettable action. Or you could just buy it now…
Jeremy Brown’s Intimate Art Kit
This is for the serious art lovers and those who really like to make a splash. Jeremy Brown, a South African artist, has caused major waves on the web by advertising kits for make-your-own art.
The twist? It’s created while you’re getting intimate.
His Love Is Art kits contain a non-allergenic canvas and some toxin-free paint that’s easy to get off. (There’s also cleaning-up material, a large plastic sheet to lay down on either side, and protection for your feet afterwards so you won’t track paint on the carpet.)
And that’s all – you cover yourselves in paint, lie down and get busy.
The results are more spectacular than you’d imagine – though if you’re inclined towards off-the-bed styles like on-your-knees, be prepared for a more abstract look. Plus elongated sessions may mean an entire canvas filled with ink!
The finished pieces Scott displays on his website look disturbingly elegant, but as a representation of what you really do in bed, you can’t beat it for a souvenir- and nobody needs to know how it came about…
Image: LoveIsArt.
The Boudoir Bible by Betony Vernon
Forget Fifty Shades, this is the new erotic book that will take the world by storm.
Written by Betony Vernon, a famous muse of Jean Paul Gaultier and owner of an exclusive, by-appointment-only erotic boutique in Paris, it’s aimed at 21st century lovers wanting to explore new things.
It’s also a very chic accessory – it’s delicately illustrated, comes in a discreet wrapper and is pure elegance.
It tends towards the more BDSM end of the scale, so if you’re a beginner and want to explore things with your partner, this is a good way to start. It’s very non-threatening and encompasses virtually every fantasy.
Plus, and this is always a good thing, it doesn’t demand you buy all sorts of fiendish equipment to make your dreams come true.
Agent Provocateur Xena Cuffs
We can’t neglect Agent Provocateur, can we? And yet their gift section is sometimes horribly neglected for their gorgeous lingerie.
However, this Valentine’s Day go beyond the panties-and-waspie norm for something slightly more unusual and couture.
The Xena Cuffs are made specially for Agent Provocateur, in either single or double form. They come with a tassel for gentle teasing, and the Double Cuffs are for pinning the hands behind the back or knees (or whatever other position you like).
They also have a secret inscription: ‘As I am, you were. As I was, you will be.’ Mysterious, erotic and stylish – what more could you want?
Image: Xena cuffs.
Sex Rocks! Oral Sex Candy
Now this is just a cheeky little treat. From Coco De Mer, it’s popping candy like you’ve never used it before.
Putting popping candy or sherbet on your tongue before indulging in some oral is an old (and slightly odd) trick, but Coco De Mer’s formula is actually body-safe, so it won’t risk allergies or nasty side affects.
After all, sugar on the intimate parts of either gender is a bad plan for encouraging infection – so buy a specialty pack rather than anything from the supermarket.
It causes shivers and interesting sensations for both parties – but don’t use it on a very sensitive partner as they may rocket through the roof.
Lelo Spicy Clove & Amber Massage Oil
Lelo are a fantastic maker of toys, but they don’t restrict their repertoire to that. If you’re wanting something fresh this year, try their new range of massage oils.
The Lady Friday favourite is the spicy clove and amber version, which is warming and delicious-smelling. Both scents are known to be sensual triggers – smell is one of the most erogenous senses – and the warming sensation is incredible, and filled with gorgeous natural oils to soften the skin.
The best bit? It’s filled with 24K gold flakes. This is a severely luxurious gift, and never again will your lover say you don’t appreciate them.
Tips: give them a bath beforehand and massage their scalp thoroughly with shampoo, which is known to turn the entire body into a tingling nerve. Then pat them dry and massage them top to toe – include ears, neck, hands and soles of feet.
Lelo says that if you want a truly spectacular experience, you should dip the bottle in warm water beforehand so that it glows with heat.
Image: Lelo spicy clove massage oil.
Doc Johnson Black Rose Spank & Smooth Cream
Now this is a boutique product. It may not appeal to all, but for those who like their bedroom action with a bit of spanking, it’s a whole new world.
Doc Johnson’s apothecary of wonders has released the Black Rose Spank & Smooth Creams, which come together.
The Spank cream is a sensitivity-enhancing cream designed to make the skin more aroused to touch, while the Smooth cream is a soothing lotion to cool redness and reduce ache.
They’re both passion fruit scented and non-allergenic, though it’s important not to get the two confused – placing arousal cream on an already red bottom will almost certainly result in irritation.
It’s particularly recommended if you use paddles or other devices rather than just the flat of your hand, but all things must be cleaned afterwards – the cream isn’t meant to stay on leather for long.
A note: don’t just spring this on an unsuspecting partner as a gift unless you’ve either done some spanking before or you have a very strong hunch they might appreciate it.
Lady Friday xx
Taking the pillow talk out of the bedroom, every Friday…